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By: Mike Reistetter

As per the now for-sale estate of former TV host and political satirist, the multi-Emmy Award-winning Jon Stewart, he and an entire bandwagon of celebrities are holding true to their word, set to permanently re-locate from the USA to Canada after Donald J. Trump won the presidency on Tuesday.

Seeing the opportunity to expand their brand and programming even further than they’ve already done, Netflix wasted no to time in literally offering Stewart trillions of dollars to come out of retirement and helm the first reality series for the streaming provider, titled “Good Migrations.”

“If more people voted with as much passion as I have when I host, then maybe we wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place,” a restless Stewart said while in his eighth hour on a line at the DMV to renew his passport.

The series will naturally be set and filmed in the hamlet of British Columbia, “Libe Rall Falls,” an agriculturally and technologically advanced, utopian-like community, which will, upon the debut of the series, house its inaugural residents.

Named for the pseudonym of the first Hollywood Celebrity to ever dodge the draft by fleeing the country, Libe Rall Falls’ mission statement on their yet-to-be accredited website aims to: “Provide refuge for those who have others make their bed, yet give themselves all the credit for lying in it anyway.”

Accompanying Stewart on his journey to the self-proclaimed “Smart Town” inconspicuously located in the heart of the Canadian Outback somehow, are other A-listers such as:  Samuel Jackson’s purple light-saber from his time spent with the evilest chapter of the Jedi Council, a cardboard cutout of Bryan Cranston in a meth-making quarantine suit, a miniature wrecking ball sent by Billy Ray Cyrus on behalf of his daughter, a ‘Ghostface’ mask signed by actress Neve Campbell, and Rosie O’Donnell.

“While I would have hoped most of my fellow entertainers would have made the treks themselves, I understand their reluctance,” Stewart said. “But rest assured, me and Rosie are going to try our best to remove the America from ‘American Idiot.’”

Green Day declined interview, but not before their manager divulged a band name change was likely in order since ‘climate change’ is now “more screwed than your upcoming Netflix queue.”

Before throwing his cell phone out of a car window, you could hear the faint sounds of Billie Joe Armstrong’s voice, incidentally singing the proposed “Good Migrations” theme song, which GD has been tabbed to record.

“I, loved the uni-colored pants suits she wore,

And the way the U.S. labeled her an E-mail whore,

I’m, gonna need to buy myself a disguise,

So the media doesn’t catch me running there.

I’m feeling all our good migrations,

(Avoiding all the Facebook condemnations)

I’m feeling all our good migrations,

(Canada’ll be a more responsible nation!)

Good, Good, Good Good migrations!

Just thinking up a road to salvation…”

While it is certainly a work in progress, a poignant reminder is evident within these edgy lyrics: If legendary songwriter and musician Brian Wilson actually signs off on allowing Netflix to sample his music, then disgruntled Americans can stop whining about their having chosen a droopy, ulcer-causing soup when they would have slightly preferred the stale-crutoned, E.coli positive salad.